electricity was cut off this morning due to some checking .
this decision made me leave the hse at 9.00 am .
went to compass but none of the shops were open except for the foodcourt .
dropped my books and went to sihui's hse .
CIP sucked . total dissapointment .
when i saw all the prefects and prefects on probation having so much fun ,
i quite envied them though . i wasnt given the form cause choir was alrdy performing .
but i wanted so much to join them . then i might be able to have fun and help the childrens .
choir totally flopped . none of the childrens were even watching us .
might as well don't perform .
anyways , i really hope i don't get marked by the student council .
i missed 2 activities for POPs . cause of CCA . i don't mind though .
i just hope i won't get marked . I'm always the one left out anyways .

i really wish i could join them , help the little children .
when i saw the little children crying , i wanted so much to help them !
when i saw them smile , i wanted to be the one who help them smile .
why can't i be like the rest ? why can't i attend most of the activities ?
i wanted so much to become a prefect ! i'm going crazy !
but due to my CCA , i rarely had a chance to attend the activities !
shld i give up on my CCA or give up on being a prefect ?
I'm totally depressed . I can't be as outgoing like yeehui , i can't be good at handling things .
Feels so inferior . I really hate my life sometimes ..